This too shall pass

I haven't forgotten to blog so much as I haven't wanted to write about the things that are going on in our lives at the moment. Looked at through the right lens (let's call it the Erma Bombeck lens), they could be funny. But when it's you and your life and you're in the middle of it, nothing about it seems funny at all. On my recent good days, I feel lucky to have so many supportive friends and family members who can help us make this transition from Texas to Georgia easier. For instance, our cats are "vacationing" at their Grandparents house and, though I miss them intensely, I know how much time and effort and worry their vacation is saving me. On my less good days, I wonder what I did wrong in a previous life and fantasize about punching previous-life-me in the face because thanks a lot previous me.

The less satisfying truth is that, sometimes, for no reason at all, things just go wrong. Too bad I can't punch "nothing at all" in the face. (Here my brain helpfully suggests that I can punch the air and then I sass myself with the knowledge that air is still something and that punching it will not make me feel better at all.) So here we are, in the middle of a house sale in which the only thing that might go right is that we sell a house. (If you are thinking that that sounds pretty alright, ask me for the full story sometime but come prepared with a stiff drink to share.) Here's a barometer for the last two weeks: Assume events can be placed on a sliding scale that ranges from awful to less awful to neutral to good to genuinely fantastic. The least less awful thing that has happened is that our garbage disposal fell out of our sink, with food in it, while I was doing dishes. You really can't make this stuff up...

In the midst of all this, I was on the phone last night trying to catch up with my Aunt. At the end of the call, after patiently listening to me rant for over an hour, she reminded me that what will happen will happen regardless of whether I am frustrated or scared or angry or even happy or peaceful. It's a true statement though one that I would only take to heart from a handful of people, if that. From nearly anyone else, the same advice would sound trite and chiding. From my Aunt though, it was a warm and loving thing. Despite being true, it's tough advice to put into action but also a little bit freeing. It reminds me that I can only do so much and that, when I have done what I can do, it's time to put the rest aside. Sure, it won't stop me worrying but it does help me let go of some of the anger and frustration that come from feeling like I am a very small person pushing on a very large and immovable wall.